Last night, hubby and I decided to get together with a friend who will be moving to another city soon. She asked to meet us at Primo’s, where they had $3 margaritas on Tuesdays. There were two things she said that made me wary of the place. First, the cheap drinks which is like a beacon for a crowd, and the second, her actual comment that by 8 pm the place is usually standing room only.
My mistake was not to eat before heading over there, and I couldn’t help not making it there until 8:15 pm because of my work schedule and where I lived. But make it we did, and if I had wanted a big crowd and no table available for another hour then I would not have been disappointed.
Nevertheless I had fun. I caught up with my friend’s plans and antics, met a few of her friends, finally got to eat. Primo’s tortilla soup and chicken sour cream enchiladas were very yummy, though the enchilada’s really rich (I took a bite of hubby’s order). I had chicken quesadillas which was just ok.
I wasn’t there to party and I felt odd doing the bar-hopping scene which I had never really gotten into before. We ended up migrating to another bar, with celebrity-sightings (Mike Madono, an athlete of some sort) to boot, and lots of beautiful, glossy people milling around. I enjoyed watching them; I like people watching, though hubby was making signs at me he wanted to go home as early as 10 pm. He doesn’t miss this scene either, and we both missed our big overstuffed couches and beds.
The setting is a single’s scene, plain and simple. The play is navigating flirtations, finding the right balance between tipsy and drunk, hooking up with the right girl/guy of the moment, and hopefully leaving together, to enjoy Act II of whatever you may want to imagine. There are dark elements in the corners of this scene. Aside from alchohol that clouds your judgement, there’s also illicit drugs thrown in the mix, yes, even among highly intelligent, successful yuppies.
I don’t know whether I’m lucky or unlucky never having to navigate the dating world much, which the bar scene and club scene seems so much a part of. I have had two boyfriends in my life. One was a 6 month not-too-serious one, and then Woody. I dated a total of 3 guys before Woody. No, I wasn’t the dating kind, and no, I was never fat or ugly. I sometimes think that I was born to be married to Woody. We clicked right away and was talking marriage a month into our relationship.
Well, the night ended, and we went home. Dating looks fun but also looks fraught with uncertainty, lonely moments, and other pitfalls. Honestly, I felt such a big relief at being married.
I know exactly what you mean Tin. We went out for a girls night not too long ago, and while it was nice to get away, I couldn’t wait to get back home. I never dated a whole lot and when I was “dating”, bars were not my spot of choice to find what I wanted. I am not the type of girl that will spend 3 hours to get ready to go anywhere and being around a bunch of plastic people makes me crazy.
I agree with you 100%.
You put it so beautifully Tin! I, too, am so relieved to be married. I guess the bar scene would’ve appealed a lot to us during our single and dating years but now that we’ve found someone to settle down with, comfort trumps “the scene.” I’m so done with that. If I were given a chance to live those party girl years all over again, I wouldn’t take on that chance anymore. I’m happier being at home, watching DVDs with the best date in the world — my husband!
I completely agree. I don’t really do the girls night out thing. Never been into it. I don’t like going anywhere without Brian. I do like to go dancing from time to time but Brian is always with me.
Me and my friends seldom go to bars anymore. I think when you’re in your early 30′s, you feel old going there. But the reason we go anyway is to unwind, chill out or just plain hanging out w/ ur girlfriends. If a cute guy comes up and asks for you digits, wouldn’t that be a bonus too?
pixie: hey there pixie! thanks for the feedback. me neither. the longest I take to get ready is 45 min.
toni: homebodies unite! hahaha
ching: I often say that Woody is my favorite company.
portia: I guess my adventurous spirit doesn’t extend to the realm of flirtation. I often feel very uncomfortable being hit on.
I wanna get married and settle down as well since I am tired of kissing strangers
I was never into the club scene either, that was only for girls night out! I have always been a homebody, preferring to entertain or stay in. I think it’s all about the context, if I’ve got good food and company I’m alright with that!
during my time which is awhile ago in the Phils- dinner at shakeys pizza and beer in greenbelt makati then off to one of the disco houses nearby where we danced our hearts away for a couple of hrs then coffee at the Peninsula Hotel Lobby till 3am then off we go our separate ways taking note of our respective taxi’s plate nos. good clean fun. like you i am happy to be settled and the sooner you do it too with the right partner, the better. all the best tin.
I enjoy a girl’s night out once in a while coz mommies need to have some fun times with their fellow mommies too. since we moved to NC i haven’t met anyone to go with and well i got pregnant so i’m on hiatus right now..lol
anywya, when we were in NY my friends and i would usually go to the Gay Clubs. We actually prefer it coz we felt safe there, believe it or not. there were no guys trying to pick us up. i love dancing with gay guys. they’re such divas and so competetive..hehe.
but yeah at the end of the day, nothing compares the cuddles with the hubby while lounging in the couch, watching TV and raiding the fridge for leftovers
I talked to a [single] guy in his 30s and his experiences about dating in the 21st century. Some girls are brutal out there! hahaha.. Like you, I’m glad that I don’t have to join the rat race. It’s slim pickins out there (at least where I am anyway).
Hey, I never enjoyed the dating scene in those noisy crowded and smoky bars either. For girls’ night outs, I preferred to eat and drink coffee and just make chika.